Thursday, April 13, 2006

Loss...

Been thinking about loss... pretty much all night... I thought I had my iPod working - it responded to a reset - but when I went to listen to it this morning, the wee sick icon came up again and a repetitive whining was audible... like the harddrive was stuck - like a scratched record.

So I've been thinking about loss... I can't afford to replace the iPod... Sure I have the Nano that Bobby lent me but that's temporary... and I have the 2nd gen 10gb "classic" but that's Ollys now.

Ironically, I got given a Shuffle yesterday by my work in recognition for work done on my previous project. I was delighted to pass it to Olly. Looks great round her neck (Yes I know I am a geek!) and I want her to have it.

But its not the same without my 40gb 4th gen... Its become part of my cultural identity... A tool for listening to music, audio books, podcasts... I used it for my daily devotions... for learning... for relaxing... for passing time... Its part of me.

When I consider my loss, I am fortunate. Yes, I can't afford to replace it but I it CAN be replaced! No one has died... its not that serious.

However, taking the feelings I have... the emptiness... the sense of loss... and using them to help me empathise... consider how much worse it must be to lose a loved one - someone that can't be replaced.

I recently lost my Uncle Robert and there is a hole in my life without him. His influence in my life... now that he is with his Maker... is evident. I miss him.

I then take my feelings and consider how God must have felt... The only way we could come back into communication with Him was for Him to give up His only son. As we think of the Last Supper and Jesus' suffering at the Garden of Olives... think of how God must have felt when He heard His son say ::
Father, remove this cup from me. But please, not what I want. What do you want?
Luke 22:42 (The Message)

Think of how devastating that must have been to hear... and to say!

Even though my we'ans drive me mad... I could never consider my life without them. I feel sick at the very thought. Sure I like to torture them... like any good parent does :: but I can not/ will not see them suffer... I just can't!

How much more must it have felt like to consider the suffering that Jesus was under was what His Father wanted to happen... so that we, who are unworthy and broken, can come back to Him.

Sure we know what happens next... and there is a sense of wonder and joy as Jesus defeats death through His resurrection on that Easter Sunday so many years ago.

Bu today... please take time to consider the loss felt... and understand the suffering that was necessary to give us a second chance.

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3 comments:

Nuno Barreto said...

I really sounds like a corrupted disk. But have you tried reinstalling the firmware?

headphonaught said...

Can't get my iMac to see it... I can get it to Disk Mode but still can't be seen.

It has done this once before... I packaged it and left it alone. It was my wife who tried to reset it when the battery was dead...and it worked.

Here's hoping...

mathaionios said...

Can't help Thomas, but to say that I know the feeling. My Tungsten E2 died on me earlier this year. I was gutted as I use it all the time - for work as well as anything else.
However - you're right. I lost my dad last year. There is no comparison, really. The contrast is so stark it's not worth comparing the two.
To my next point - how can we begin to comprehend what God went through during the time leading up to, and during the cross. Perhaps the contrast is less stark but still, it's miles away from anything I have experienced.

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